Fish. Abso-bloody-lutely marvellous little chaps but a pain in the bum to keep cleaning out, particularly since they have none of the cheeky, cutesy appeal of say, a hamster.

Still fish bring their own brand of relaxation to the party, so it's no surprise that they're a big hit in dentist's waiting rooms.

The idea being that the fish relax you to a higher state of consciousness before Dr Root Canal comes along, tooled to the hilt, and brings you back down to earth with a dose of agonising pain.

If you're after the relaxing, calming effect of fish but don't want to suffer excruciating discomfort immediately after, then might we suggest our USB MiniQuarium? Powered by the gift of Universal Serial Bus, our aquarium houses two beautiful fish, making no unreasonable demands on your time in order to feed them or clean them out.

If you fall in love with your new fish tank and want to move it away from the computer, it can also be battery powered.

Fish are fairly low maintenance I'm sure you'll agree. Our USB MiniQuarium is zero maintenance, plug 'n' play fish-based heaven.