A massage can grab you the sort of brownie points from your partner that are usually reserved for sports cars for Christmas and the like. You do, however, have to endure hand and finger cramps that would make Ralph Fiennes think twice.
Still, there's always the miracle of the refreshingly simple Omniball massager. Take one revolving ball, insert into an ergonomically moulded grip and leave to massage for half an hour.
By the end of your session, you'll feel fresh as a daisy and your subject will be prepared to carry out your every whim. Surely worth half an hour's toil. Bag two of them and launch a two-pronged assault on the backs of your subject, ironing out stress and pain as you go. They'll thank you for it in the end.
World domination take your fancy? Then why not massage your way to omnipotence. It's altogether more soothing than using guns and missiles and yet will have your foes reduced to quivering wrecks in your wake. 'You dare to defy me? Bring me the massage oils...'
Every Sunday evening, without fail, my girlfriend asks me for a back massage. She works at a desk all week and I understand how sore her back can get. And if I expect to get any love for the rest of the week, I have no choice but to comply! Thanks to this little gadget, she's getting the best massages of her life and I barely have to lift a finger. George Bauer, Pembrokeshire
I'm on my feet all day and I spend the entire tube ride home envisioning the wonderful feeling of my ball massager on my tired feet. It never, ever disappoints. Very soothing. Dan Tuft, Whitehaven
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Omni Ball Massager
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